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Eyes up, heart open

Carla Ten Eyck

The Knot Pro Workshop at The State Room Boston

Carla Ten Eyck speaks at The Knot Pro at The State Room in Boston MA

 

The Knot Pro Workshop was hosted at The State Room in Boston, MA this past June. I was asked to share about how to ‘Be True to You and Still Get Hired’ on social media. Being authentic in social media has been a hot topic for a while in the wedding and event industry. There can be such a disconnect there for those of us who cater to a level of clientele that may or may not live the kind of lives we live; so then how can we be ourselves and still get hired?

My whole theory is this: we will connect with those clients we are meant to, once we understand exactly who it is we are marketing and selling to. Who do we want to work with? What type of wedding or event brings us the most joy? These kinds of questions can be overwhelming and may even just make us want to quit the whole social media piece of our business altogether. But don’t despair! Just take it one small step at a time.

I tend to look at this all more simply. If you are just who you are, then it’s easy. If you spend too much time pretending to be someone you are not in order to attract certain types of clients, I think the game gets harder and you will eventually tire of it all and quit. Who has the energy for all that? The answer? Just be YOU.

A good friend of mine and I were chatting about this all and the subject of vulnerability online came up. She said that people become attracted to others who are being vulnerable online but then it can run the risk of being more like vulnerability porn. There is an attraction and a repulsion there; too much is… well, too much. If you share too much you can run the risk of being seen as too vulnerable, too broken, and then you can lose your power of coming across as the expert.

I admittedly toe the line. I love sharing who I am, openly. The reward of feeling connected to others is worth it to me, and when I know what I am saying can help make others feel less alone in this world, then it’s a win for me. We all feel alone at times, some more than others, and it’s nice to know you have company.

On stage I am in a happy place. Cracking my dry jokes and letting the occasional ‘bull shit’ slip out while crying brings me joy. I love seeing all of those faces staring back at me and am often tempted to point at someone who thinks I am not seeing them because they are in a sea of others -I SEE YOU! YOU, WITH THE GLASSES ON AND THE GREY SWEATER! I. SEE. YOU.’ But …. maybe it would make them uncomfortable. It can be so easy to move through your day, or through life thinking that others may not see you. But know that I am that weird lady who looks out the window and sees an airplane and I peep way up in those windows and imagine someone sitting in that seat looking out and feeling so small in this big world not knowing that the Mexican American Gay Oprah is standing in her living room in Hartford CT seeing you fly by and wishing you safe travel or wondering what you are thinking about. Where are you going? Going away or coming home? I wonder that. And then I laugh each time I do this, aloud, to myself.

See, this is the kind of stuff I put out on social media and honestly don’t think twice about. It’s who I am, it’s not offensive, even though it may be a little weird. It tells people how I think, how I strive to be aware, present and to think of others.

I quoted a passage from one of my favorite books that I have read last year. It’s called The Shift, How Seeing People as People Changes Everything by Kimberly White. Do yourself a favor: BUY IT AND READ IT. I was a little smug when I read the title at the airport and was all ‘Oh I know this already’ but something pushed me to buy it anyway and I am so glad I did! I could not put it down, and have since bought many copies and sent them to others. It was so impactful, insightful and really resonated with me in my heart. Brava, Kimberly White! Go buy this book and read it, I promise you it will change you.

Photographer Carla Ten Eyck teaches at The Knot Pro Workshop at The State Room in Boston MA
Professional Photographer Carla Ten Eyck laughs during her speech at The Knot Pro Workshop at The State Room in Boston MA
Carla Ten Eyck laughs during her talk at The Knot Pro in Boston MA

 

If you look really closely you can see my teeny face in the top middle of the row!! My sweet daughter Georgie took that photo and I am so excited not only to be in that lineup of stellar folks but also that her picture is here!! Eeeee!

 

I met Jove Meyer at The Engage Luxury Wedding and Business Summit at The Fairmont Banff, in Canada this past June. He is one of the most inspiring speakers and people, and I am so happy to be able to call him my friend!

 

The Man, the Myth, the Legend: Bryan Rafanelli of Rafanelli Events! I have known Bryan for a few years and every time I see him I am left more in awe than I was before. He is such a class act. So kind, and sweet. I love how he keeps pushing his business and his brand to be better for his clients.

 

Check out the video of The Knot Pro Workshop by the amazing ladies from Key Moment Films:

Boston Knot Workshop from Key Moment Films on Vimeo.

Thank your to Anja and everyone at The KnotPro Workshop for seeing value in what I do and inviting me to be a part of something so wonderful! I loved connecting with everyone there so so much and can’t wait to do another event with you all! XOXO

Planner: We Tie The Knots | Venue: State Room: A Longwood Venue | Photography: Anna and Spencer Photography | Videographer: Key Moment Films | Rentals: Peak Event Services| Linens: Nuage Designs, Inc. | Floral: Beach Plum Floral Design | Favor: Gutsey| Favors: Makeyourlifesweeter Fluffpop | | DJ – cocktail reception: Elevated Pulse Productions | DJ – program: 617 Weddings & Events | AV: @Gemini Audio Visual Inc | Beauty: B Lovely Beauty Studio | Photo Booth: Luke Renchan Entertainment | Event Branding + Stationery: Meldeen | Publishing Partner: Two Bright Lights | Timeline Program: The Timed App / Carla Ten Eyck

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